Death surrounds me...

So, I am back in town and I returned to an e-mail that was sent while I was in the bus back... my grandmother has passed away. And I hate that I can't be there. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: These are the times when you hate living overseas. When you can't be with your family when you need to be, it's hard. I've wanted to be with them all year as I've known that my grandma and one of my aunts are going through hard times. And now, when I really want to be there, and SHOULD be there (I'm on vacation for pete's sake!), I can't. Money has restricted my travel this summer to everything in country, and nothing far off. I wish I could be there. I really want to be there. I love my family. I was looking at pictures, and I can't believe that now her house is going to be cleared out and I won't be going back there. I've known for a long time that she wants her house sold... but man, I wish that wasn't the case. I want to walk back into that house, pull strawberries out of the fridge, put 'em on some cereal, and sit and eat with her. I love her. I loved every moment I spent with her. She was amazing. And I'm not going to be able to say good-bye.

RIP Grandma. I love you dearly, but I know you're with Pa now. I hope you enjoy the view.