Thursday, June 28, 2012

Goodbyes are never easy...

I've said a lot of goodbyes in my life. I've said a lot of hellos, as well.

But I realized something: Goodbyes never get easier. 

And I don't know why, for me, they seem to be getting harder. You'd think I'd get better at them the more of them I give, but I think I've learned some lessons over the years.

I've learned...
1) some goodbyes are going to be forever.
2) it's not just the big goodbyes that matter.
3) you don't know when it's forever.
4) each person deserves to know what they mean to you.

I've gotten much more emotional over the last four years. And maybe it's because of the goodbyes that I wasn't able to say.

See, last year, as I drove myself up north, back to the town of my birth, I saw the sign that announced I was back in my hometown, and I started to cry. Thinking about it now makes me cry. Part of it is because the last time I had left that town (in 2009) was the last time I had seen my grandmother alive. I was coming back to a town that was forever changed from what I knew. I had never even been able to say goodbye. It hurt to drive in knowing that it would never be the same. Not like that.

I spent the summer hanging out with my family. My aunt and uncle, cousins, second cousins, my sister and her kids, my other sister and her kids, my brother, my dad, my other aunts and uncles... in and out of homes and living the life. I left at the end of the summer broken-hearted that I wouldn't be there for the foreseeable future. Going back this weekend makes me insanely happy.

All these goodbyes in my life have made the hellos so much sweeter; no matter if they are new or old.

Hellos are definitely my favorite, but I will relish every goodbye. Goodbyes mark chapters in our lives, periods of significance. Goodbyes are probably one of the most important things we say, because they let us know our lives are changing and moving. They are the rocks in our rivers, causing rapids that help keep us moving and make it interesting.

Enjoy the rapids.

3 comments:

Nikki Clifton said...

Very nicely put...I like it! :)

Nikki Clifton said...

very nicely put...I like it! :)

Nikki Clifton said...

very nicely put...I like it!